Blackbeard Wants To Be a Dodger, Pisses Off Giant Fans

Hey I can’t say I blame Wilson. You can file this under hilarious guys. According to our rival brethren Around The Foghorn, Brian Wilson the Giant’s former closer, also known to us as Blackbeard, has said he would prefer to pitch for the Dodgers this season. Apparently Wilson lives in Los Angeles during the offseason, and would want to stay close to home.

ATFH quoted Yahoo’s Tim Brown who reported the unreal on twitter with this tweet.

You can file this under as the screw turns. Wilson is coming off of Tommy John surgery, and is not expected to be tendered a contract by the Giants by Friday’s deadline. If that happens he would become a free agent and be able to negotiate with other teams. Wilson only pitched in two games last season before blowing his arm out in April. The Giants already have guys like Santiago Casilla, and Sergio Romo who can handle the eighth and ninth inning duties, so it doesn’t look like they’re going to tender him.

ughhh, yuck! Wilson wants to be a Dodger? No thanks. Yuck, look at that nasty beard, he looks like a hobo.

Now don’t get me wrong here, Wilson has been a good pitcher over the last five years or so. Despite the guy being a total weirdo, he has saved at least 36 games in four of the past five seasons. The only season he hasn’t saved at least that many games was this last season of course.

He has a career 3.21 ERA, 171 saves, three all star selections, a 9.6 whiff per nine rate, and a 4.0 walk per nine rate. He’s been a closer since 2008. He has his best season in 2010 when he saved 48 games and posted a 1.81 ERA, while finishing seventh in the cy young voting. The right hander is 30 years old, and made 8.5 million dollars last season.

This makes me wonder what Giant fans have actually been doing since they won another World Series? Have they been partying up and down San Francisco? Tossing rice, and batteries in the air, while wearing those annoying little panda hats? Nope, apparently they’ve been crying a river over the fact that Blackbeard no longer wants to be the Giant’s closer, but even more shocking, he wants to pitch for the Dodgers! Oh the horror for San Francisco fans! What’s next for them? Pablo Sandoval wanting to dye his hair Blue? How about the Willie Mays statue being covered in Blue paint? Can you imagine what would happen up there? There could be a riot! According to ATFH, there is some hurt feelings on both sides. Cry me a river Argentina.

Well the Dodgers don’t need Wilson anyways. We already have a closer, and two other bad ass set-up guys. (Brandon League, Kenley Jansen, and Ronald Belisario) Unless Wilson doesn’t mind pitching in middle relief and take a couple of million dollar pay cut, then I just can’t see this happening. Our bullpen is full. Apparently the Red Sox have also expressed interest in Wilson. Fine by me, let the Red Sox have him.

However if Wilson were to pitch for the Dodgers, he would have to shave off that nasty ugly scraggly moonshiner beard he wears. Otherwise I am afraid he might be mistaken for a homeless vagrant by the Los Angeles police department. Giant fans have nothing to worry about though. I think we’ll pass.