The Joe Blanton Sucks Forum

With Dodger news so slow right now, and the holidays approaching quickly, we have to find ways to entertain ourselves as this slow winter drags on at the pace of a snail. One of the ways that we can do this is by laughing at and documenting some of the worst pitchers in MLB, especially ones that were former Dodgers.

While looking around the internet I came across this hilarious site called the Joe Blanton Sucks Forum, or the anti-Joe Blanton site. This is a forum dedicated to the crappy pitching of Joe Blanton, A.K.A Joe Bumton. if Bumton’s putrid pitching has ever sparked the rage within you, then I encourage you to read on and enjoy. Most of the site involved Angel fans commiserating at having to watch the worst pitcher in Baseball take the mound every five days. It’s a pain we as Dodger fans can relate to. After all Bumton was a Dodger for a couple of months at the end of the 2012 season. Oh man if only we could forget!

Joe Bumton-Kirby Lee-USA TODAY Sports

As you all know, Bumton is a ten-year MLB veteran starting pitcher who pitched for the Dodgers in 2012. He also pitched for Oakland, Philadelphia, and now recently the Angels. The 32-year old right hander has become the worst pitcher in all of Baseball. If you remember the Dodgers acquired him from the Phillies in a waiver trade for minor leaguer Ryan O’Sullivan back in August of 2012. Of course Bumton was predictably awful while wearing Dodger Blue. Bumton pitched ten starts for the Dodgers posting a 2-4 record, a 4.99 ERA and allowing 10.3 hits per nine, and 32 earned runs, in just 57 fruitless frames. Bumton is a true Bum, a Bum’s Bum if you will.

Last winter the Angels were so desperate for pitching they signed him to a two-year 15 million dollar contract with a club option year. Bumton took his horrendous pitching across town to Anaheim as he donned the periwinkle red uniform of the Angels. Man those poor Angel fans.

Not surprisingly Bumton was simply atrocious. Bumton pitched in 28 games in 2013, starting 20 of them and posted an astoundingly bad 2-14 record, with a 6.04 ERA. Bumton allowed 180 hits in 132 frames, while serving up 29 home runs, 12.2 hits per nine innings pitched, and 96 runs allowed. Blanton allowed four or more runs in 13 of his 20 starts in 2013 for the Halos. He was so bad that the Angels were forced to move him into the bullpen. Hint….He’s still bad.

Check out the hilarious comments on the Joe Blanton sucks forum from some aggravated Angel fans. We feel your pain Angel fans. We had to put up with him for two months in 2012, which was two more months than any team should have to deal with this overpaid bum.

That actually almost happened last season. Can you imagine a Bumton versus Josh Beckett showdown of washed up pitchers? Which bum could out-bum the other? Actually Bumton did face the Dodgers once on May 28th at Dodger Stadium in which he lost 3-0. Bumton allowed three earned run in seven frames and has to live with the embarrassment of being the only pitcher in all of Baseball last year to allow a home run to Luis Cruz.

Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Tue, 23 Jul 2013 02:53:13 GMT

This bum Blanton just flat out sucks . Man I can’t stand watching him pitch .

We feel your pain, we do.

Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Tue, 23 Jul 2013 20:27:35 GMT

he brings the whole team down with his patheticness

Hey remember in 2012 when Blanton told reporters that he didn’t care if Dodger fans booed him because he was used to being booed in Philadelphia? Welp…….

As a matter of fact, Blanton had one of the worst seasons in MLB history for a starting pitcher. It was almost historically bad. His only two wins came on May 23th at Kansas City in which he struck out just one batter, and on June 29th at Houston.

Anonymous (Rookie) wrote on Wed, 04 Sep 2013 08:47:56 GMT

The fecal distribution of his pitching is breath-taking!

Indeed it is, indeed it is. Joe Blanton made 6.5 million dollars in 2013, and is due to make 7.5 million in 2014.