The Golden Bum Of The Year Goes To………Chris Perez!
By Scott Andes
It’s that time of the year again my lovely Lairians. With the season long in our rear view mirror, it’s time for our season reviews, and awards. Stacie has already published our Lasorda’s Lair Blue Ribbon awards, which crown the best performers in each pitching, hitting, and fielding category. But now the time has arrived to go the other way.
I think you know what I am talking about, and it must be done. This time we will be giving out the award for the worst Dodger player of the year. We’re calling it the Golden Bum of the year award. Or just simply put, the Bum of the year.
The term “Bum” has been around since its creation during the Brooklyn Dodger days of the 1950’s originally coined and created by cartoonist Willard Mullin, the word connects us to our Brooklyn roots and harkens us back to the days of Ebbets Field and the boys of summer.
Chris Perez-Mark J. Rebilas-USA TODAY Sports
But the term Bum also defines a terrible player. A player so bad that he excels at being awful. I whole heartily believe that the Bums should be recognized, and their failures properly documented at all times. How else would we be able to differentiate between the good and the unspeakably bad? There will always be Bums.
As you know, we’ve already documented the top ten Dodger Bums of all time, with Career utility Bum Juan Castro taking home the The number 1 Bum spot. Now every year we at Lasorda’s Lair will crown our own Bum of the year after every Dodger season. Who do you think was the biggest Dodger Bum this year?
This isn’t simply about who was the most disappointing, or the player that never played up to expectations. This is about failure. Pure and unfiltered failure at playing Baseball. In order for a Dodger player to qualify, he must play with the club for at least most of the season. One bad month does not qualify here. The Dodger player must be awful for an entire season.
This season was a touch choice. We had several Bums who were pretty bad, gaining attention for nomination, but we felt like they just weren’t bad enough. Maybe not quite Delino Deshields poor, but definitely Darren Dreifortesque in their performance.
So without further adieu, this year’s Golden Dodger Bum of the year award goes to…..(Drum roll please)……middle reliever Chris Perez! Congratulations Chris! You did it!
Thanks to Perez’s horrendous relief pitching all year long, he has indeed taken home his very first Bum of the year award.
Perez’s nickname in Cleveland was “pure rage”, but ironically only Dodger fans felt that rage when Perez was on the mound. The Dodgers signed the portly 29-year old right hander to a 2.3 million dollar contract last winter. Perez was supposed to give the Dodgers an additional right handed set-up option to pair with Brian Wilson. And while Wilson himself was a nominee for his pathetic pitching, Perez took home the award by being so atrocious; he beat out his bullpen mate.
Perez posted a 4.27 ERA, and a 5.07 FIP in 49 games for the Dodgers this season. He struck out only 39 batters posting a 1.3 WHIP, and a 7.4 hits per nine rate. What put Perez over the top here was his inability to throw strikes, or Baseballs anywhere near home plate. Perez walked 25 batters, posting a 4.9 walk per nine rate. Perez almost had more walks than hits allowed. Perez recorded one measly save to go along with his 1-3 record. Perez had a 5.11 ERA on the road, and pitched just seven innings in September before succumbing to bone spurs in his ankle. He was subsequently left off the playoff roster.
Some of Perez’s lowlights this season included giving up three earned runs and three walks in just two thirds of an inning in a loss at Washington on May 6. Of course the game at Pittsburgh on July 22 we will never forget, that was the game where he walked four consecutive batters.
It was a touch choice between Perez and Wilson. Both were bad this year. But we felt that Perez was more consistently bad throughout the season. While Wilson being almost equally horrible, had more stretches of decency. Both hurlers definitely stunk. Perez just stunk a little more.
Please note that the award has the number two Dodger bum of all time Garret Anderson on the front. Anderson’s historically bad 2010 season was one of the most punch-less in Dodger history. Notice that the image displays Anderson doing what he did best while with the Dodgers, swinging and missing. You can see the pained and grimaced look on his face while doing it. Anderson was a master at making outs. The veteran still gives hope to all future Dodger Bums that they too can suck at Baseball.
We don’t know whether Perez will be back with the Dodgers in 2015. But we do know that he will be taking home an award this offseason.
Congratulations Chris! You are indeed the Golden Dodger Bum of the year for 2014.