Crazy number of Dodgers hit paternity list in unforgettable 2022 All-Star Game twist

Los Angeles Dodgers v Chicago Cubs
Los Angeles Dodgers v Chicago Cubs / Jamie Sabau/GettyImages

Who knew that, while Giancarlo Stanton was winning the 2022 All-Star Game MVP, it was actually the Dodgers who were more regularly scoring?

Nine months to the week of the All-Star festivities in Los Angeles, the Dodgers were hit by a team-wide plague so powerful that it even spread to Chicago and affected former Dodger Cody Bellinger.

That plague? Fatherhood.

Bellinger, along with current Dodgers Mookie Betts, Evan Phillips, Max Muncy and Brusdar Graterol, all hit the Paternity List en masse in recent days, meaning they deserve a little bit of congratulations for leaving their teams short-handed for the best possible reason.

As it turns out, top prospect Michael Busch can thank the '22 All-Star afterparties for his fortuitous MLB debut. Everybody was, uh ... everybody was having a good time back then, huh?

Dodgers Paternity List Gate 2023: 2022 All-Star Game Week in LA seemed fun

Most importantly, we can all have a nice laugh, because it seems as if every Dodger/Dodger adjacent baby is happy and healthy.

MLB's ill-conceived rules gave everyone a brief scare when Phillips was also placed on the bereavement list, but it turned out to just be semantics; the team announced the birth of his son on Wednesday morning.

Well, either it was semantics, or Phillips killed someone during last year's All-Star break while he and all his teammates were also doin' it.

What can we say, though? The Dodgers knew what they were doing last year when they invited Bad Bunny to play in the Celebrity Softball Game. Play stupid games, win stupid prizes.

As far as timing goes for team-wide baby breaks, the end of April isn't necessarily a bad one. Perhaps MLB's would-be fathers should target this year's All-Star break in Seattle? Especially the Mariners; the 2022 Dodgers benefitted from two games "at Anaheim," a four-game stretch of partying, and a seven-game homestand immediately thereafter.

Don't be stunned if we see Cal Raleigh welcome a "Little Dumper" to the world next April.